When it comes to making meaningful social change and righting injustices of our past, it can be really confusing, overwhelming, and make it difficult to know what to do next. 

This video post is all about how you can be an ally and an advocate every single day.

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If you prefer to read, here’s what you need to know about being an ally and an advocate every day:

It's really, really important during this process to stay humble and unassuming. Staying curious is a good idea because this stuff is hard. 

I want you to feel uncomfortable. 

Not overwhelmingly uncomfortable that you feel like you can't make any changes or movements- but just uncomfortable enough that you're ready to make a change. 

It's awesome to do this for a week but that's not long-lasting. As a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, I actually get special training in these particular issues every single year. But that doesn't mean that I'm ever done learning and growing and improving.

 Long-lasting change is incremental and it's something that you have to keep doing.

BELIEVE PEOPLE WHEN THEY TELL YOU THEIR STORIES

This is probably the number one factor that I see about what makes therapy work. Letting people know that their experience is real, it matters- and that it makes sense- makes a difference.

When you tell somebody that they're lying, misinterpreting, or that their story isn't believable, you're basically telling them that their experience isn't real and that it doesn't matter. And that's just not true. 

In the media, there are a ton of examples in movies, in plays, in music of how unbelievable these stories can seem and be. And yet they are true. 

Don't be so quick to discount somebody's story by saying that it's unbelievable or that it couldn't possibly be true or that because your experience is different that their experience could never happen. 

Instead do these things:

• stay curious

• stay unassuming

• ask questions

• get clarity

It's not your job to tell somebody that their experience is not true. It's your job to believe them.

TAKE YOUR TIME AND SIP FROM THE CUP

I know a lot of you when you hear these horrific stories, you wanna jump in and fix it. You wanna save the day. You want to be the superhero, which is totally natural but it's not really helpful. 

Many teens that I work with love to solve problems. But most of us don't need any help with that. 

When we're sharing our experience and our story, we're not asking for you to jump in and fix it or solve the problem for us. We're just asking for you to listen and bear witness to the experience and validate that it happened and that it was true. 

Fixing something like systematic oppression and racism is a much bigger fix than these quick-fix problem-solving things that people suggest. 

Big change happens incrementally in the small actions that you take each and every day. And that's how you maximize cultural shifting and change.

For some people, you're just getting clued into these conversations, which I think is great. 

Please take your time and sip from the cup.

When you try to drink in all the information and all the resources at once, your brain can't hold that much new information at once. It needs time to marinate and settle in. 

I don't want you to overwhelm yourself and burn out before you can burn bright for this change.

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REST, RESTORE, AND RETURN WITH RENEWED ENERGY

Now, for others of you, this is not new information. In fact, it may actually be your lived experience. It can be exhausting to be inundated with all these reminders of traumatic experiences that you're exposed to and living or that you have lived through in the past.

You are allowed to tap out, take a break, rest, restore, and return with renewed energy. 

One of the great things about social movements is that you don't have to bear the brunt of fighting this fight alone.

 There is a community with you.

We are all standing together, which means with enough people, you don't always have to be the one on. You don't always have to be the one showing up. 

You're allowed to take time and space away so that you can come back and tap somebody else out, which is pretty cool. 

EXPOSE YOURSELF TO OTHER VOICES

Be intentional and start exposing yourself to other voices and messages outside of your own experience. 

Check your playlist, your movie list, your bookshelf and see how many artists and voices are different from your own race. 

Seeking out other voices from other races, ethnicities and cultures is so important because as you get familiar with other voices and other lived experiences, it decreases that anxiety and fear of the unknown. 

You don't only have to read and reflect and interact with different cultures around issues about social reform and justice. 

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This is about getting familiar and comfortable with other voices.

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Tell me….

I hope that you found this information valuable and helpful and if you did, let me know in the comments over on my YouTube channel- you can click here to go to this video.

And please be sure to share this video because you never know who you could be helping in the process.

If you want to know more about what coping skills to use for crisis survival, click this link to watch a great video on this very important topic.

Want even more positive influences in your teen's life? Teen Girls Therapy Group is a weekly space where your teen girl can connect with others dealing with anxiety, depression, or low self-esteem. By talking and learning together, they learn to feel better about the relationships they have with themselves and others.

If you want to secure your teen's spot- schedule your complimentary 15-min parent phone screening by completing the contact form here.

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